Gail Sheehy's New Book About Seasoned Women

"Brilliant Buckets," April 22, 2006

Reviewer: John P Bernat (Kingsport, TN USA) - See all my reviews

I loved Gail Sheehy's "Passages" and have, for many years, used the concepts in it in my work.

Her great gift is to collect examples of complex human behavior and add value by then having these seemingly random observations come together into a sensible, useful pattern. She creates "buckets" and then deepens our understanding by explaining the contents of these buckets with insightful personal illustrations and storytelling.

Honestly, I'd not followed her career since that time, and read this book on recommendation of a friend. I was enormously glad I did. Sheehy's pervasive curiosity and optimism inform every page. After being exposed to a fairly rigorous framework for viewing women after age 40, we learn that 40% or so are into or ready for functioning as "seasoned women." These are courageous, life-embracing people who have learned but not become embittered, and who enjoy life from a platform of risk acceptance out of self-confidence in these learnings.

It's not a retelling of "Sex in the City." If you're looking for endless dishing, you might come away really disappointed. However, there is plenty of wonderful storytelling. And the stories are not just about finally ending WMD* marriages. They also affirm the deepest satisfactions of long-term relationships and disclose some wisdom about how to keep those relationships viable and, more importantly, personally rewarding for all concerned.

My personal understanding of how women at this age think and function was deepened immeasurably. And I was left with a great optimism about the future we all share. "Life is what we make it." Optimism is a choice, and the wisest choice any of us can make. I thank Gail for giving us all this wonderful book.

*"We're married, dammit!"